I will never forget the fall of 2014. Alone in my car and heart broken I turned up Chris Brown’s song “X” as I drove out of a friend’s house. I was angry and felt I had had enough of everything a certain girl was doing. With a grin on my face and anger in my heart, I turned up the volume and sang the words: “I swear to God I am moving on.” Then I drove off, bouncing to the beat…never to contact her in anyway for another two years. Relationships and the pursuit of a mate can really get distasteful once the person we gave our all to, treats us disrespectfully. And with the pain comes the breakup and what many like to call the period of moving on.
So what happens next after the breakup? Fresh Status updates, New DP’s with quotes about finding people who deserve us, crying parties, scouting social media for the next mate? The list is endless; however, the one thing many people forget to do when feeling hurt and bitter after a break up, is to go to God for restoration and direction.
When God needs your attention
If we will all be real with each other, you’ll agree with me that many young relationships are struggling to keep themselves chaste and their relationships pure. Many are burning (battling with strong sexual desires) and others have given up on fighting temptations. This creates two key problems, the first is that both people in the relationship tend to find it harder to hear from God and secondly, they lose their covering and His presence as a result of the sin.
Listen! The Lord’s arm is not too weak to save you,
nor is his ear too deaf to hear you call.
It’s your sins that have cut you off from God.
Because of your sins, he has turned away
and will not listen anymore (Isaiah 59:1-2).
Some break ups are just God’s way of getting your attention, and to get you back on track to fulfilling your purpose with all godliness. He can and will divide you from anyone who causes you to drift away from Him till you are mature enough to be in a Godly relationship.
That said, so rather than crying, you need to run to God for restoration and direction. Too many young people have drifted off the path they should be on because of the relationships they find themselves in. Truth is this, if both of you as a couple cannot learn to fight sin together, how can you ever fight bigger battles together when you get married? Think about it? If you can’t fight a temptation together, can you fight together to keep your marriage from crumbling or secure your children from attacks and more through prayer? The thief (the evil one) comes to steal, kill and destroy as Jesus pointed out in John 10:10; the question is when he comes, will you be ready as a team to fight? Or would you be too weak through sin to wage war.
Always look at the bigger picture. Every seed sown today is reaped tomorrow. Many young couples have unfortunately sowed into the flesh and that’s why their relationships are filled with arguments, cheating, hatred and lies. As the famous saying goes, when you give the devil an inch, he takes a mile. So when you open up your relationship up to acts that displease God, your relationship will become nothing more than a house of cards.
Make a resolution in your heart and mind to live a godly life which can only be by God’s help. Ladies, don’t devalue yourself in order to get affirmations from people or in hopes of finding someone to love you. Treasure yourself as a vessel of God. If you want to be found by someone godly, don’t clothe yourself in the pain from your past but be covered by meekness. To all guys reading this I will say, breakups put you back in hunting season to find a mate, but be careful not to moved by looks but by your purpose. Not every pretty girl you see can and will compliment your God-given purpose.
On that note, I will end here. Thanks for reading 🙂