Love Lost

The topic of heartbreaks is not a strange one, but rather, one many people are familiar with. Some, unfortunately, are very familiar with it. Inasmuch as many of us will like to deny this, we all at a point in our lives, have been heartbroken or disrespected by a person we loved dearly.

The reasons behind or the events that lead up to heartbreaks are numerous, and in hindsight many people try to find logical reasons for not being able to control their feelings, but never find one. With that said, it’s safe to always consider the devil factor, that is, how he (the devil) plays a role in filling us with hate, and leading us down the road to madness, revenge or into sin.

Characteristics and effects of a heartbreak

Heartbreaks always come unexpected, and for that reason we never plan to counter the shock and the pain before they hit us. Heartbreaks always leave us looking for love in or from another person: not pure love but the selfish kind: lust.

Heartbreaks do not only reduce our self-control, but they also make almost every person (of the opposite sex) around us, look sexually attractive. And sometimes, almost every person who is really nice to us, begins to look like a “potential candidate” or a free meal.

Questions and the Answer

What happens behind the scenes—when we are heartbroken—and how can we counter them?

Heartaches occur when the same amount of love we have for a person is converted into hate: this is what causes the pain we feel in our chest and the sleepless nights. Afterwards, our yearning for love or to get rid of the hate in our souls is what leads us to pursue or rather prey on other members of the opposite sex; all with the hope of receiving our missing love back.

So how do we get our love back? How do we cure ourselves of the heartache, the pain, the sleepless nights and the emotional torment?

The answer is simple, yet because of the hate we feel towards the people who hurt us, it doesn’t even seem like the or a last option. Before I share the solution with you, I will love to tell you a short story from my life. Somewhere in the middle of 2012, I was really mad at my Dad for reasons that don’t bother me know. I was so consumed with rage that I would stay far away from him and isolate myself in dark rooms to reflect on life: I can’t explain why. My Mum for some strange reason, always found me sitting in the dark. And whenever she did, she would ask me what was wrong with me and why I was beginning to act weird. Sure enough I gave her the generic answer after a long pause: I am fine. During those couple of days, my mind was consumed with dark rebellious thoughts, and this lead me to begin work on a book I never published: it was going to be a very depressing book. I was breaking down, and my heart didn’t feel right: I felt like acid was literally being poured into it, and no matter how much I prayed for the pain to leave, it never did.

One night, as I was thinking about my life and how much I yearned to be loved—I just needed to flush the hatred I felt for this world out of my system, my Mum came to my room and said something that pierced my conscience. I will never forget her words. She said, after I ignored a question she asked concerning my Dad, “don’t let the devil use you.”  Her words hit me so hard that I got up straightway, and headed to my Dad’s room to end my torment. I walked into his room, and after greeting him—a simple good evening and a heartfelt smile, the pain and sorrow in my heart lifted. My earnest act of forgiveness, was the cure to the pain I was feeling within and the darkness that was taking over my soul.

God’s solution to heartaches, as I figured a couple of months later (after a much worse incident concerning someone else—no dark rooms again by the way), is to love and forgive the people who hurt us; that is, to love them not with the kind of love that made them hurt us, but rather, with pure love: the God kind-of love. The cure to the emotional torment is, to love them just as God loves them, that is, not to think evil against them.

Giving the devil a foothold

Paul tells us in Ephesians 4:26:27 that, ” Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil.” He said this because, anger which is ignited by the evil thoughts that keep evading our minds; which is again as a result of the hurt we have stored up in our souls, gives the devil a chance to torment us.

Every thought about a person who hurt us in the past, that leaves us down, depressed, sad, in tears or on the verge of madness is not of God. Thoughts that are from God are praiseworthy, pure, lovely, of good report and so on as we are told in Philippians 4:8.

“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” (Philippians 4:8)

Heartaches, emotional stress, sleepless nights and other related conditions are forms of demonic torment. They come about when we allow the devil to use our anger against us.

Jesus said in John 14:30 that, “Hereafter I will not talk much with you: for the prince of this world cometh, and hath nothing in me.” The question is, when he comes, will he find anything within us, primarily hatred?

When we give him a foothold in our lives, he in turn torments us. Out of this torment, some people go crazy; some turn gay; some turn into perverts or become very promiscuous.  Some, out of the extreme hate for women or in an attempt to pay girls or a certain girl back, turn into sex traffickers, pimps or abuse other women in various ways. Unfortunately, some people also end their lives. The list is endless, but at the end of the day, lives are destroyed.

12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood [the human beings who hurt us], but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places [who are on a mission to kill, steal and destroy: to turn us into monsters].

13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. (Ephesians 6:12-13 emphasis mine)

“Sin looks very appealing, when we go on a quest to find something only God can give us: love. #Lovelost”

Scriptural References: Ephesians 4:26-27, Philippians 4:8, John 14:30, Ephesians 6:12-13

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